Author (#1)January 2006 Archives

Today we had a new garbage disposal installed. The original one installed in the house was basically "rental grade" and starting to deteriorate badly. At Thanksgiving I had to patch up a leaky connection on it with silicone glue, and we finally decided it was time to replace it.

The old disposal is sitting in a box ten feet from me. I can't bring myself to throw it away.

See, it's got a perfectly good high-torque electric motor in it. I'm sure it will come in handy for a project some day.

This is the kind of stuff that drives my wife crazy. I have to save it.

I have been riding to and from work for the past couple weeks without paying.

The other day the sheriff's deputies came through the car checking tickets. When they asked me for mine, I told them they couldn't see it, and to back off. They threatened me with a citation and I got belligerent.

The next thing you know, I'm face down on the aisle of the car, screaming "I Smell BACON!" while the two deputies cuffed me and dragged me to the door. They radioed ahead to the next station and when the train pulled in I did the perp walk past the gawking crowd to the hard plastic back seat of a waiting cruiser.

Katy finally came and bailed me out after leaving me to cool down in the holding tank for most of the day. I'm not really sure what came over me there. I guess I'm just a Criminal at heart.

Okay, okay, perhaps I embellished the story a little bit.

The truth?

I did ride for a week using an expired 10-trip ticket. I did finish using all the expired rides on Wednesday evening. There was a sheriff checking tickets on Thursday morning, the first day I started using my new non-expired ticket. I had my ticket out to show her as she approached and she thanked me as she went by. There was a person (not me) getting a ticket in the train station parking lot that morning, presumably for speeding. People really fly up the road on the way to the train station, you know. So do you think I can get a book deal?

Yesterday I replaced most of our kitchen faucet. The finish was getting cracked and scratched, and so I cashed in on American Standard's lifetime guarantee and had them send me new parts.

It was late when I went to reconnect the faucet and there was a slight plumbing problem.

And so this morning I was at OSH buying new rubber gaskets. As I walked up to the cashier, she asked "How are you doing this morning?"

I smiled and said "I'm at the hardware store before 7:30 buying plumbing parts. How do you think I'm doing?"

She wished me luck.

In keeping with my traditions, I'm in the middle of playing a two year old computer game, Knights of the Old Republic, aka KOTOR for you gamers out there.

It's pretty fun, although it is much more cinematic than the last old game I played, Neverwinter Nights. It is very hard - no, impossible - to stray from the path of the story. That said, the story is good and I'm enjoying it thus far.

The other night I finally got to the point where I became a Jedi Padawan and acquired a lightsaber. Cool! I started looking around for some bad guy to off with my new uberweapon.

The first beastie I ran into was an overgrown pig with horns. It took me several swings to kill the thing.

What?

Dude. It's a lightsaber. It can cut through anything - I've seen the movies. The sizzle of bacon should be filling the air before you can say "Han shot first."

I understand the desire for balanced play, but are you trying to tell me that Mr. Pig has some kind of cortosis weave in his horns? My disbelief is getting unsuspended.

Everybody misuses the phrase "begging the question" these days. I know I'm being pedantic but this sort of thing makes me crazy.

Usage is sometimes difficult to explain but this comic sums up both the correct usage and my feelings:

Oh and while I've got you - these Dinosaur Comics are hilarious. Hilarious I Say!

UPDATE: Want to know more about "begging the question?" Look here.

I just got back from a whopping 2.5 mile run.

I couldn't make it around my entire 3.5 mile loop. If you ask why I cut it short, I'll tell you "because the dog was with me and she seemed to be tiring," but that's not the whole story. Two-plus months without a run is a bigger part. I'm winded, my lungs are burning, my heart is tripping like a jackhammer, and my thigh muscles are tightening up while I sit here and type this.

But you know what? There's no pain whatsoever in my right knee.

This is bringing me a special kind of euphoria. I'm back, baby! Bring it on!

I was in Las Vegas this week for CES and saw my new gadget lust item: the Samsung Helix.

It's a portable XM receiver/recorder/mp3 player - no external antenna required, 50 hours of storage, blah blah blah. I can't explain why it appeals to me so strongly but it does. I want one.

Now. NOW! NOW!!!