The Sad Tale of the Zombie Cherries

A couple years ago I "made" cocktail garnishes to give as holiday gifts to all my hard drinkin' friends. I got some jars and filled them up with olives, cocktail onions, and maraschino cherries. I then poured dry vermouth over the the olives and onions, and bourbon over the cherries. Very simple.

I gave a "set" to my friend Doug, and in the course of the ensuing conversation he mentioned that he had once been served a Manhattan that was garnished with a fresh cherry. Hmm. Fresh cherries.

So, this year I decided I would try this little trick with fresh cherries. One fine Sunday morning last June I trekked out to our local farmer's market and ploinked down the big bucks for a couple pounds of fresh bing cherries. A stop at the store for a cherry pitter and some canning jars, then the liquor store for some bourbon, and I was ready to go.

I washed and pitted four pint jars full of cherries that afternoon, and poured enough bourbon into the jars to cover them. I closed up the jars, stuck them in the back of the refrigerator, and promptly forgot all about them.

Fast forward to this weekend. Katy has done her Thanksgiving shopping and is trying to fit everything into the fridge, including a 20-pound turkey. "What are these jars back here?"

My cherries! I pulled one of the jars out to check on them. But something wasn't quite right.

I opened up a jar and fished one out. Ewwww! The fruit was still pretty firm, but that color! It looked like it had been underground for several months, all gray and mottled. I couldn't bring myself to eat it. It was a Zombie Cherry.

Lest the Zombie Cherries somehow break free of their glass prisons to feast upon the flesh of the living - as human zombies are wont to do, at least in the movies - I ran them all down the garbage disposal. Sigh.

I wonder if dried cherries would work. Perhaps a small experiment is in order.